[Transcript of Answer]
Tips For New Moms Not To Be Overwhelmed
I wish there was more for you. I wish we were like other developed nations where you could take six months or a year or two off with your child because that’s what you and your baby need. You need time to just crawl into bed and be with that newborn baby for at least six weeks, and somebody else handling the hard work such as the housework, or the older kids. And you’re probably not going to get it. It’s just the way the United States is today.
Building a Network
So, the best thing that I can advise is to build up a network of people before you have your baby. Yes, it’s nice if you can afford a doula, postpartum doula, or a home healthcare person. That’s probably not going to happen. But, have a friend or family member come the week after the baby’s born, maybe two weeks after, rather than right at the birth. You need someone that can just help out and come in twice a week, straighten up, maybe lay out dinner for you so you don’t have to deal with those issues.
Also, try to trade off things. So, if you have to go get your other child from school, maybe you can trade-off with another parent so you only go two or three times a week. There’s a lot of help out there and you don’t necessarily realize it. There are an awful lot of new moms in exactly the same situation as you. Try to build a real connection with them. Whether it’s through the church, the local coffee shop, or the park. Wherever you can meet a person, you can probably find somebody in the same boat.
Returning to Work
Oh man, it’s such stress to be a new mom. And I wish it wasn’t. It should be the time when you’re just treated like a queen. And I know for a lot of you, you have to go back to work right away. I consider that a crime actually, but that’s how it has to be. You have to go back to work right away.
I think we also need to call the men to step up; our brothers, our fathers, our uncles, our male cousins, and absolutely our partners and the fathers of those babies can all be supports, too. Men need to understand that the relationship that is laid down during these first six months is crucial. What happens in these first six months is going to affect whether you can relate to that six-year-old or that sixteen-year-old and it is absolutely worth the time and absolutely worth the financial investment.